Is the opening statement clear? If not, how would you change it so that it is clear?
- Is the information complete? If not, what is missing?
- Are the sentences concise? If not, what words would you eliminate to make them more concise?
- Is the message courteous? If not, which sentence would you change?
- Is the letter correct (free of grammar, punctuation and spelling errors)? If not, what needs to be corrected?
Dear Mr. Tom Black:
I wish to draw your attention to an up-coming event that we are organizing for the purpose of celabrating the retirement of our Directer of Finance Mr. Melvin Switzer. The event will take place on the 23rd of July and we anticipate your attendence at this function. You are cordially invited to a dinner being held at the Diamond golf and country Club at 6:30. The dinner will be a formal afair so please make sure you ware formal cloths. You can bring your wife if you want.
If you have any questions, contact Julie Smith at ext. 451 and she will be happy to furnish you with any other additional details.